Okay, so let me just say something quick. I have been very busy with school work lately so I haven’t been able to do my Nickelodeon Month. Sorry to the 2-3 people who actually wanted to see that. It will happen at some point, just not now. Now, on with the list.
Now, I’ve been a fan of creepypastas for years now. I have just always found them intriguing. There are a lot of great creepypastas out there but, sometimes, you find a really shitty one. Like, REALLY shitty. So, today, I’m gonna countdown the top 5 worst creepypastas. *Note: This is not in any particular order. I’m not good at doing ordered list. This is just 5 really bad creepypastas.
5. DeadMan Jim
Wow is this a really bad creepypasta. Like, wow. There is just too much going wrong with this. It’s a short gore-fest that makes absolutely no sense. Let me give you a short summary.
2 guys, the nameless “protagonist” and his friend Frank, are playing Guild Wars 2. They want to go try out a dungeon but want one more person to come along. They ask someone in their clan they’ve never seen named DeadMan Jim. Jim asks if he can join their Skype call and they agree. Once he joins they see a hanging man and someone screaming “‘Hey Jimmy… Jimmy… JIMMY!” the creepy voice screamed and he said, “Jimmy… There is someone who wants to talk to you…'” They try to kick him out of the call but their computers freeze and a power surge happens. The “protagonist” goes over to his neighbors to tell them the story and, their reaction is priceless. The one thing they have to saw to him is “Oh my god…That’s a really messed up story…” You can just see the emotion in this text. Suddenly a power surge happens in their house too and on the door, written in blood, is the words “DO YOU WANT TO SEE FRANK? LOOK AT YOUR PHONE!” He looks at his phone and there is a cat with red eyes (Really? Are they being serious?) behind him. Suddenly a man bursts into Frank’s house with a cleaver and kills him. End of story.
Wasn’t that just spooky? Man, I got goosebumps going up my arms.
This story is just so stupid. It’s a short gore-fest and nothing else. There is no substance to it. I don’t recommend this story at all but if you want to read it I’ll have the link below.
Rating: 1.5 Red-Eyed Cats/5
4. Who Was Phone?
Yes, I know this is a troll pasta. Yes, I know I shouldn’t take it seriously. But…come on! Even troll pastas have some effort put into them! I’m not going to bother summarizing the story for you as it is literally only a paragraph long but if you wanna read it the link is down below.
Rating: 0 Phones with Daddy Issues/5
You may be asking why this one made the list. I mean, it is only one of the most popular creepypastas of all time. But, popularity doesn’t all mean quality. Look at Miley Cyrus or Amanda Bynes for example. So, the summary.
The “protagonist” is a huge Sonic fan. He just loves Sonic. One day, his friend (I believe his name is Kyle) sends him a game. On the disk, written in sharpie, is the title Sonic.exe. Now, any sane person who gets a strange game from an old friend would just throw it away. But not this guy. This guy, being a huge Sonic, just has to play it. He must play it! So he puts it in his computer and then the rom-hack starts. Everything is in *gasp* hyper-realistic blood! Sonic kills Tails! Then Shadow! He even kills Robotnik! The “protagonist* just watches in horror other than, I don’t know, just shutting off the game! Finally, the computer just shuts off by itself. The “protagonist” just sits back in horror. Now, here’s the real kicker. Are you ready? Are you sure? Okay, here it goes. *sigh* He turns around and sees his Sonic plush with *gasp* blood under his eyes! Also, he…he’s…SMILING! *girl scream*
God is this a cliched story. It’s just “Blood! Blood blood! Blood! BLOOOOOOOOOOOOD!” It’s not scary. It’s not suspenseful. It’s just stupid.
Rating: 1 Creepy Kyle/5
2. Tails Doll
My god. What is it with Sonic creepypastas always having to be shit? Well, this is one isn’t much better than Sonic.exe.
Guy is playing Sonic R. Finishes race. Gets up. While away, Can You Feel the Sunshine? starts playing very loudly. When he walks in the room the music stops and is on the character select screen. The cursor is stuck on Tails Doll. Decides to just play as Tails Doll. When in the race, the songs starts again but *gasp* backwards! After he finishes the race the power goes out. He goes to turn on the power but sees two red lights. When he turns on the power there is a Tails plushie sitting there! He goes to grab it but there is a loud scream. He looks away. When he looks back the plushie is floating. He grabs a cross on his desk, gets the plushie in the corner, and burns him with the cross. He is then knocked unconscious by an unknown source. He wakes up to see the plushie on his TV with “Can You Feel the Sunshine?” written in blood. He is then killed by Tails Doll.
Wow, I’m trembling from fright. Another cliched story like Sonic.exe and DeadMan Jim. It’s made just to say “BLOOOOOOOOOOOD!”
Rating: 1.5 Sunshines/5
1. He Wants His Mama
Probably the best one out of this whole list. It’s at least the most believable. Now, the story doesn’t exist anymore (I just found out it was taken off the wiki), but thankfully SomeOrdinaryGamers did a video about it. I’m not gonna give you a summary of this story but just go watch the video (It’s the first 5 minutes) and come back…I can wait…
So, a lot better story than the rest of them but still pretty bad. I would say more but SOG has said basically everything I would have.
Rating: 2.5 Ghost Children/5